Day 958, Mike Pence Visits Ireland (revised after a fan comment!)
(This may be sung to “When Irish Eyes Are Smiling.) (1)
Mike Pence just flew to Ireland,
There to see their president.
But he did not stay in Dublin,
That’s the seat of government.
They’ve fine hotels in Dublin;
Beer is good and food is fair.
But Mike Pence stayed in Doonbeg,
A three hour car ride from there.
There’s a tear in your eye and it’s no wonder why
That we all just don’t break down and bawl.
Pence went to Erin’s Isle and he made Donald smile
But the ethics made lawyers’ skins crawl.
Unconvincing excuses tell why Mike Pence stayed
At the Donald’s golf club on the sea.
Blarney fit for the Isle but the clumsiest style,
Even Pence got no break on the fee.
Why did Pence stay in Doonbeg?
It’s much clearer when you know,
That’s where Trump has a golf course,
So, that’s where Pence had to go.
From there he drove to Shannon
Where he boarded Air Force Two.
And flew clear across the island,
With the bill paid by me and you.
The Prime Minister’s gay; Pence shook hands anyway,
Though he knew “mother” would be appalled.
Yet he managed a smile; though he cringed all the while,
Fearing that his soul might be recalled.
That the voters of Ireland put in a gay man,
Legalizing abortion as well,
Must have boiled Michael’s bile, trapped by such Irish guile,
Pence is fearful he might burn in hell.
When Trump flies to Bedminster,
Where he likes to golf and dine.
Or flies to Mar a Lago,
Both help Donald’s bottom line.
Trump’s entourage, enormous:
And we pick up every bill.
We can see the Donald smiling,
As tax dollars fill up his till.
- When Irish Eyes Are Smiling , 1912, Lyrics by Chauncey Olcott and George Graff, Jr. Music by Ernest Ball. This is an American song, celebrating a romanticized Ireland, not an original Irish song, although it was recorded by the famous Irish tenor, John McCormack. As Trump would say, “Most people don’t know that.” There are countless recordings.