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Donald Trump, the GOAT? - The Greatest Of All Time, the GOAT,From Trump, that is a recent quote.He says the term applies to him.But soon, we’ll put that to a vote. Trump’s ego’s pumped up to the brim,But GOAT is a Trump antonym.For GOATs do not cause such a mess.Is “pig” a better synonym? The… Read More
Have a Sandwich with Jesus
- Florida Man’s Big Chipotle Date Turns Out to Be a Police Sting, Shockingly October 8, 2026A 52-year-old man showed up to a Delray Beach Chipotle expecting a romantic rendezvous he’d arranged online. What he got instead was a set of handcuffs, a felony arrest, and the mild indignity of getting caught on a livestream watched by strangers on the internet, because in 2026 even your worst life decisions come with […]
- 76-Year-Old Florida Man Just Wanted to Drive Drunk on Rum and Cocaine, Is That So Much to Ask October 4, 2026There is a certain kind of honesty that only comes from a man who has clearly stopped caring what anyone thinks of him. A 76-year-old Florida man, already driving on a suspended license, allegedly told deputies exactly what he’d been doing before they pulled him over: drinking rum and snorting cocaine, in what we can […]
- Florida Man Skips the Neighborly Chat, Goes Straight to Hiring a Hitman Over a Drone October 1, 2026Most people, when a neighbor’s drone buzzes their backyard one too many times, do something reasonable: complain to the HOA, put up a “No Drones” sign, maybe key the guy’s mailbox out of spite. A Florida man decided the appropriate response to a drone dispute was to allegedly offer a jail inmate $5,000 to kill […]
- Pennsylvania Senator Says God Told Him Not to Run for Governor, Also Couldn’t Be Bothered to Endorse Anyone Who Is September 25, 2026Pennsylvania state senator Doug Mastriano, who lost the 2022 governor’s race in a landslide, announced via Facebook livestream with his wife that he would not be running again in 2026. The reason, he explained, was divine: “God has not called us to run for governor this year.” The couple say they prayed extensively before arriving […]
- Man Steals Tools From Work Truck, Gets Caught Riding Same Trailer On Camera The Next Day September 22, 2026On a Friday in Hillsborough County, someone broke into a parked work truck and made off with multiple bags of tools worth several hundred dollars, all caught on surveillance video, trailer and all. On Saturday, deputies spotted a man riding a bicycle down the road pulling that exact same trailer, in what can only be […]