April 18, Anglo-Saxon Values
Let’s hear it for those Anglo-Saxon
Traditions and philosophy,
For presidents like Andrew Jackson,
To Washington, right at our founding,
Our Destiny was Manifest.
Tom Jefferson gave us our grounding;
“Go west, young man,” then did the rest. (1)
Men like Jim Jordan and Ron Johnson,
Those who will take our country back,
Not presidents, like Lyndon Johnson,
Who let folks vote though they were black.
And men like Mike Lee and Josh Hawley
Espousing values of the right.
Ted Cruz is smart but creepy-crawly;
His dad was Cuban; not quite white.
Is Margie Taylor Greene alarming
For urging all to get a gun?
Conservatives find her disarming;
She thinks that shooting guns is fun.
We’ve Laura Ingrahams and Tuckers,
Fox commentators on the news.
And neo-Nazi KKKluckers (2)
Who’ll cleanse us from the blacks and Jews.
Though Anglo-Saxons gave us slavery
And split the country over that,
And though we now think that’s unsavory,
No one should be a Democrat.
So, let’s continue their tradition,
Stay Anglo-Saxon, at our core,
Do not accuse us of sedition;
Though some want one more Civil War.
It’s Anglo-Saxon architecture,
Not ruins found in ancient Rome.
Who wants to listen to a lecture
On Rome when England is our home?
There’s just one true religion for us;
It’s white folks’ Christianity.
We’ll sing the Hallelujah Chorus
To our type of humanity.
Einstein, and Erlich: both were German;
And worse than that, they both were Jews.
We use their whiteness to determine,
These are the type that we’ll excuse.
So we except some men of science,
(But mostly, don’t accept our own.)
For we’ve been taught to place reliance
On Christian faith and faith alone.
So, how about those Anglo-Saxons?
Theirs is the culture that we choose.
No M. L. Kings or Jesse Jacksons,
Chuck Berrys, B. B. Kings, or blues.
And we enjoy black football players;
We like to watch them run and throw.
But when they are big city mayors,
To us, that’s just too far to go.
So, join the Anglo-Saxon caucus,
As led by Margie Taylor Greene.
Though pinko, Commie rats will mock us,
We’ll keep our white genes pure and clean.
- “Go west, young man,” is usually attributed to Horace Greely, though its origin is disputed.
- “Kluckers,” is a derogatory, slang term for members of the KKK and other white supremacist organizations.