Mike Johnson, Mike Johnson, you recessed the House,
Is it just because you’re protecting a louse?
Recessing the House just to cover Trump’s ass?
So we will not see Donald Trump has no class?

Mike Johnson, Mike Johnson, Trump’s in Epstein’s file.
Did what Donald did back then make Satan smile?
Jeff Epstein and Ghislaine sought underage girls.
And then, to rich swine, Epstein cast these bright pearls.

Mike Johnson, Mike Johnson, what did Donald do?
Would Epstein’s files tell us whom Trump liked to screw?
Trump’s johnson, Trump’s johnson, where’s Donald’s schlong been? (1)
Were his actions crimes or were they just a sin?

Mike Johnson, Mike Johnson, swear Grijalva in. (2)
Whom are you protecting, which nervous, rich men?
Will powerful sinners now reap what they’ve sown?
How many disgusting sex crimes will be shown?

Mike Johnson, Mike Johnson, now let the House vote.
For some of your friends, would that be all she wrote?
The victims of Epstein say they will name names.
It won’t be just Donald consigned to Hell’s flames.

Mike Johnson, Mike Johnson, you make a big deal
Of being a Christian, so shouldn’t you feel
Protecting the heinous, especially the rich,
Just makes you one more sleazy son of a bitch?

Mike Johnson, Mike Johnson, you’ve devolved your spine
And shrunken your gonads, a terrible sign.
Combining these with an invertebrate brain
Helps us understand why you’re circling Trump’s drain.

(1)Two different slang terms for “penis” with interesting etymology
(2)Adelita Grijalva, the newest member of Congress, just elected from
Arizona. Johnson is delaying her swearing in because he knows that
she will be the last signature needed to force a vote demanding the
release of the Epstein files.